I always thought my life is hard and Like me, many among us believe there is life is hard... 

oh my dear friend

Do you know what happened today, What I saw and what I heard today completely change my view on life being hard well it said you are taking your life for granted, and well as it quotes me I think it binds you the same... 

so today I went to a place with my brother for some reason and we were asked to wait so I saw a place to sit I asked my brother to sit and I went out to sit on the steps so I could peacefully reply to a text I haven't been reverting... while I doing I was happy in those moments there came a small girl cute one doing her thing I could notice a hair band with a small device I thought it was a hearing aid as my brother had so I went on do my thing then after few moments my parents arrived at the venue and there were doing the same waiting for our turn to come and when my dad saw that hair band he pointed out and said see its cochlear implantation(sorry if I spelled it wrong) so this implantation is like putting a device by drilling a hole kind of thing which is nearer to the brain for better hearing... When I realized that it was the same I saw on that cute little girl... I couldn't talk for a few moments at all... all I could think was why only they? why never wanted that to happen to them? why what wrong could a 2-3 years could have done so god had to punish them? 

and it's not the only thing I met a mother who told me you are lucky and your parents too even when you have a brother with that hearing disability you are lucky because you are going to guide him through life but I have two daughters with the same disability all I could see was pain... which they couldn't convey to the world and which even couldn't be conveyed... 

These were all the things i know where i went is a place filled with stories which are similar to these are as far as i know there were about 30 people in the room... 

So bottom line...Just be grateful for what you have...if you want to thank a person let them know if you want to tell a person you love them let them know... 

Oh Dear my friend if you think life is too hard to remember you are one out of billions of people who are thinking the same what makes the difference between you and them is... Be grateful for what you have and It will just pass on soon and everything will be okay! and remember they are also people for whom your life is always a luxury so enjoy it when you have it... 

The urge of being simplified

Why is it so that we talk with everyone the same way I mean how can people speak the same way and say everyone has a different pace of learning and understanding. For the past few days, it has been bugging me and seeing people around me talk like pros and make others think like they are pros what's in it what's the deal. People speak about maturity like it's no deal but most people forget that maturity isn't about getting elder it's about being understandable by others and most importantly understanding others. From the past few years or from my experience which I had from my little life journey I understood that when we want to convey something start from the very beginning if you want to explain something just remember that they are hearing it for the very first time so even basic things would be new to them so tell them very patiently Because we don't know how people will grasp things so when we start with basics that's the case when can make ourself being understood. yesterday someone said to me what can I have experience with 20 years of age. I replied saying what do you want to learn I have known almost everything that one should know in a lifetime. when you are with a group of people let yourself understand what level you should start with first there's always a way to make everyone understand but getting everyone on the same page will always start from basic

Is it ok to make mistakes...?

I went to repair my earphones... the catch was it was working perfectly when I switched them on they were on and also they made a sound saying they were on... but when I tried to play a song all I could hear was silence so I thought to go for repairing them so I went to tried to find service centers near me and I found few of them I decided to visit them so I selected one and I went over there when I reached the location I found it was closed since last month first thing I couldn't find it... so I checked it online and found it was closed since a month... now I had no option other than returning back or else going to another so I returned home this was a few days back... and today I again went to another store and I found myself circling to and fro near to store as I couldn't find it so I decided to ask someone and I did... I found it was somewhere inside and building so I went to check it and when I reached and had my turn to let him look at my earphones... he after listening to my issue he asked whether I did try to connect it with other phones or not... that's it I understood there was no mistake with the earphones it was the phone so I decided to go over the mobile store to enquire the same moment and I left for it and when I was there he asked me whether I tried resetting my phone and he also asked whether I had backup or not... I didn't have a backup so I have to return home when I got home I started backing my data after doing it started resetting my Bluetooth setting which did its thing and my Bluetooth was functioning properly again as usual normal... 

if I could check my Bluetooth with other devices I would directly go to the mobile store which would save one day

if I could reset my Bluetooth setting then I could have saved the whole 2-3 days right...? 

so basically I made a mistake of checking my Bluetooth with other devices right...? 

but it was fine, I learned many things along the way

I could visit new places

now I do have a backup for my mobile

I could do a few things along the way

most importantly it kept me busy and I was traveling the whole time...❤

Yes it's totally ok to make mistakes but if we don't learn from it then its a big mistake

After a long time I feel void... they are mixed feelings... I am just fed up with everyone judging me over and over again on my face. Being nice, having a smiling face, talking from heart has become too nice to the people that they start judging you, you know right we can sense that we are being judged... even after knowing we talk with a smile and tolerate you because we are raised good it doesn't mean we can't speak back on your face we just don't want to hurt you for being mean on face... i know I am better in my own way and I don't need someone's validation... I know how people are...just by seeing and talking to them because I was in a campus without phones and connected to the world and I survived it I talked with thousand people I know how everyone deals with their struggles.. perks of being in hostel is that it teaches you one or two to survive in this world of rat race... people say i don't have control on body and I don't know value of money... what I don't know really is where were they when I used to go empty stomach whole day due to food I didn't like at hostel... where were they even when I had money I controlled my self not eating because I didn't want to waste money... people say I am a bad person...where I help a random stranger for reason and bring smiles on people around me... I never expect anything from anyone and for good I never say anything to anyone... if I do it is something which you should trust me rather than judging me... I have been through all kinds of conversations... I could be your greatest supporter or audience all it needs that the way you take my words... when I took vaarc text I got my results as multimodal... which means I can be thought in any way you can teach me through audio message or text message visuals or any form of teaching... I am that person who went to lot of transitions and phases of life don't you think life didn't taught me one or two good things... 

After all I am ____ person... Mixed feelings or void it doesn't matter anymore... 

 One of my friends said" How tensed I might I be but I always pretend to be cool on outside" and I really loved it because it's totally true and not everyone can see and understand it I should probably be cool whatever the situation might be because I feel many people count on me and even i scared I will pretend not to be...

Few days earlier we ran out of hotstar membership I was in need of it without spending money so I turned to my friend circle and started asking them and I couldn't find it so I just left it and from then I started thinking whom to ask and where would I get but I wasn't worrying because it was just subconscious thought and today one of friends was looking for something even I couldn't help him he helped me giving the membership 

Somebody said "for something to happen you should believe enough for it happen" And it's absolutely true

Just believe in your self and let universe do it's work❤

so a few weeks ago my friend said can we have call ...I was busy so I couldn't call him and after a few days he again directly called me this time I was free so I talked with him...so what do friends do when they have a call after a long time....they go down memory lane right....?
so he started it and it went from the things we did together to things we have gone through...that moment I realized what I was missing... I could find myself living in the moment for an hour...we don't have a pic together but we have many memories together...we started from bathing early in the Morning not to study but to steal the stationery from the staffroom to food we hate to the food we are missing the most... I still remember the last day I was coming from the hostel where I was in the hurry to get out of the hostel and now I am releasing I was not in the hurry to get out of the hostel I was in the hurry to get lost in this world...! That even when I knew it will take time to meet again we could give send off's to each other but I don't know now if we have a chance to get back again we can leave each other the same day we did that day... now I feel lucky enough to have beautiful memories which could look childish yet memorable for me...❤️That one hour made me realize what I couldn't get from anyone whoever they might be what I have been missing in life...I was lucky enough to watch and understand people... I was lucky enough to get many qualities from my hostel life....a life with memories and a life with lessons

 So couple of days earlier me and my friends attended marriage of our mam's daughter... So we went to do some works and dance... I am not good at dance so I felt I was adding any value to the trip so I did small tasks which were in my hands... When a marriage happens their would be a lot of works right.. So I did few of them and what I can do..! We a enjoyed a lot at the marriage everyone had a lot of fun we had many memories many pics together and many more... It was one of our memorable thing which we done in last two years we spent almost two days together enjoying and while we were returning there was this manager who gave compliments... And he gave me too a compliment... I usually don't take compliments and give because it makes me feel their make the person become proud and become over confident so I avoid most of the compliments but this one was special...he said I behave like a child but have a quality be a lion kind off thing...this compliment made me happy because he was a random guy... He didn't had to do it and he didn't even over praised he just said what qualities he observed in a person what made me feel special was out of 22 people he gave compliments to 5-6 and I was one of them... It really made me feel special I didn't do anything I was just being myself so it made me feel special

 https://fb.watch/a2VUMV2jOr/

So today I learnt a new thing that we don't have 24 hrs a day... We a call it a day when earth completes one rotation about its axis right... It seems earth completes one rotation in 23 hrs 56 min so we are not having 24 hrs per day and you... Then why it is considered 24 hrs per day it's because they considered sun a as reference point so we are having 24 hrs even considering sun as a reference point sometimes we are getting less 4 more min and sometimes more than 4 mins

For a moment I was enjoying it then I realized I was enjoying knowing the imperfections of the earth🙂

See our earth is too imperfect... Wait is it..? 

No it's the way we are defining it the earth is totally perfect but the way we are defining is changing...

Even before many people realize they are imperfect I knew I was imperfect and I knew many things which I normalized them...

No one is walking in my shoes no one is going through what I am going through or I am gone through... Many people say I am good many people say I have a helping nature there are also people who say I am bad there are people who say I am not perfect but what I am is because what I am gone through... I am imperfect and I am happy with it.. 😎😇

 People will ghost you once they get their work done... I have learnt this from past few months... How good you may be how friendly you may be.. They will ghost you once they get their work done... Normalize it... It's not a big thing you helped them and that's it don't expect anything in return not even a conversation just be word to word if they need something they will get to you once they get their work done normalize not expecting anything in return😊😊

So one of the stocks I invested was having a loss for too long so I stopped checking upon it for few weeks to months and suddenly I remembered I had it so I went to check up on it and this time it was on profit it was less but still it's a profit right..? 

And from then I started checking upon it unconsciously several times a day... 

It happens in life too right

When we are not having success not having growth not having a amazing life no body checks upon us and once we start having success and having even small exciting thing in our life people just come around us...! 

Don't worry if people don't come around you don't worry if people don't show intrest in you just be the way you are..! If it's exciting for you then it doesn't mean to excite others so just enjoy what ever you are doing without thinking about THE PEOPLE.... 

 I start my day with making decisions may be it's just small but I make my own decisions and I alone face the consequences I learnt it from few days every day I travel by bus and the only thing I observe is whether the decision I took was right or wrong

I have many ways to reach home almost around four ways and I have to choose in between the four ways and I have to choose the most best way sometimes I have to run from one end of the road to the other end and again back because I feel I may be taking a wrong route but whatever it may be I alone will be facing the consequences right and I myself have control over my things which I learnt from last few days..!